On rebirth and recovery
Creating a new life from the compost of the old
Life rises out of death, death rises out of life; in being opposite they yearn to each other, they give birth to each other and are forever reborn. And with them, all is reborn, the flower of the apple tree, the light of the stars. In life is death. In death is rebirth.
- Ursula K Le Guin
Rebirth, renaissance, revival. Call it what you will, this powerful concept and process allows us the grace and space to begin again. Just as nature goes through ever evolving cycles of creation, maintenance and disintegration, then back to creation once more, so to do we.
Rebirth is explored in so many cultures and societies around the world, I couldn’t possibly delve into all of them here, but for me personally rebirth reminds me that we are never fixed or static. Rather we are ever evolving with the potential for change, growth and renewal always within us.
ABOUT REBIRTH
I find that diving into the etymology of words is a great way of deepening our understanding of the processes and experiences we are attempting to name.
In terms of ‘re’ there’s a fascinating ‘push me pull you’ forwards and backwards feel to the meaning;
Birth has a number of meanings, but in a context outside of childbirth I like this description;
to produce or create something; to cause something to start existing
When you bring those two words together, there is the notion of creating over and over again, or going back to the point of creation to start the process once more.
The thing I find comforting about rebirth is that we get to take all the lessons and learnings from our previous experiences and create something new to bring into the present, which is informed with knowledge and wisdom from the past.
We can use our pain, fear, suffering and anxiety from that which has gone before as the compost for creation, growth, transformation and change. And if we can harness that, align ourselves with the laws of nature and be an ‘agent of progressive change’, as Vedic Meditation master Thom Knoles discusses in this podcast, we get to determine our experiences and be an active participant in our life, rather than life simply happening to us.
REBIRTH SYMBOLOGY
The lotus flower is a powerful symbol of rebirth across many cultures. In ancient Egypt, the lotus flower was very important in their culture. Meaning creation and rebirth, it was a symbol of the sun because at dawn the lotus flower climbs up above the water and opens up, then at nightfall the bloom closes and goes beneath the water once again.
It is the national flower of India and Vietnam and lotus flowers feature extensively in both ancient and modern art, architecture, scripture and spiritual teachings.
In Autobiography of a Yogi, Paramahansa Yogananda notes;
The lotus flower is an ancient divine symbol in India, its unfolding petals suggest the expansion of the soul; the growth of its pure beauty from the mud of its origin holds a benign spiritual promise.
We can take inspiration from the lotus flower as we contemplate rebirth. Just as the bloom pushes through the mud and grit to flourish everyday with brilliance and purity so can we - each moment, each day, each lifetime is an opportunity to begin again and try something new.
MENOPAUSE AS REBIRTH
Menopause is an incredible example of rebirth, a bright and fierce midlife hot bloom that burns away anything that’s extraneous and unnecessary to make space for what’s new and important in our third phase of life. The process is a rite of passage, like puberty, where the body and the mind undertake immense shifts that can result in a wholly new view of the world and our place in it.
Many cultures have a deep understanding of this transformative process, for example;
Three years ago this week, I had a profound experience within the realm of menopausal rebirth that caused me to ‘lead a new life’. After misdiagnosing myself with food poisoning and spending a torturous day or so at home believing I was going to eventually get over it, I ended up finally giving in and being taken to hospital. I eventually discovered that it wasn’t bad takeaways that were the problem, but rather my only remaining ovary was being torsioned to the point where they had to undertake emergency surgery. Unfortunately they were unable to save it and I was thrown headfirst into menopause.
I’ve written about that experience here and how I mothered myself through the change here, here and here, but I wanted to further explore menopause as a rebirth in this post, because there can be a lot of doom and gloom about this change of life which does a real disservice to the transformative journey that one gets to go on throughout this process.
For me, this was supercharged as I didn’t have the regular gradual decline in hormones that most women experience while they spend 3-10 years on average going through peri menopause - it was all working one minute, then not the next.
This catapulted me into a bodily rebirth instantaneously, but it has taken my mind a good few years to catch up. I definitely went through periods of grief, regret, sadness and anger as I worked on my ‘compost’ for my new life, but I also got to let go of so many unnecessary things through the process - unachievable societal expectations of how a woman should be in the world, the tyranny of perfectionism, an addiction to busyness, concern for how others perceived me, the desire to be such a good girl. I can’t say that these have completely disappeared, but I certainly give far less of a sh*t about it all these days and the process of rebirth was what allowed me to begin again and create anew.
My rebirth has included retraining to become a coach so that I could support other women going through this process, embracing the spiritual side of my life more fully, making much more space for rest, becoming a meditation apprentice to support the evolutionary development of the collective consciousness and letting go of the hope of fitting back into most of my beautiful vintage clothes anymore!
EMBRACING REBIRTH
The thing about rebirth is that it is up to us as to whether we wholeheartedly embrace it, make the most of the experience and become an agent of progressive change, or we just passively go along for the ride, let it happen to us and fear the changes that it brings. A few questions to ponder…
Are we willing to let go of everything that doesn’t serve us anymore, even if we may have desired it for so long?
Can we be brave and step into a brand new space that we may have felt wasn’t open to us before or we didn’t know existed?
Where are we holding back in life or working towards an agenda that isn’t actually our own?
I love the quote from noted anthropologist Margaret Mead who said;
“There is no more powerful force in the universe than a menopausal woman with zest”
Let’s fully embrace any rebirth that we experience in our lives with zest and make the most of the lessons, opportunities and transformations that it brings - mud, grit, water, compost, blooms and all!
As Thich Nhat Hahn notes;
“It’s like growing lotus flowers. You cannot grow lotus flowers on marble. You have to grow them on the mud. Without mud you cannot have lotus flowers. Without suffering, you have no way to learn how to be understanding and compassionate.”
AN INVITATION FOR YOU…
Join Sierra from The Grounded Circle and I at the School of Modern Meditation on Friday 23rd February from 7 - 9pm for our Full Moon Circle: Rebirth, Lotus Tea Ceremony & Meditation experience.